Olympian Facebook: With Percy Jackson and Co
by ILike2Write
Summary: Olympian Facebook - made by Hephaestus - and features Percy Jackson and the gang. Pranks are played by you-know-who , Apollo's haikus just about kill everyone, Leo crosses the mark; resulting an angry Annabeth. And Annabeth has a question. Oh, and Jason gets a horrifying punishment. Just perfectly normal happenings. Rated T for mild swearing.
1. Introductions

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Percy Jackson and the Olympians or The Heroes of Olympus, and never will.**

**Hephaestus has an announcement to make:**

TO ALL YOU GODS AND DEMIGODS, I NOW PRESENT TO YOU…

* * *

**Olympian Facebook **

* * *

This is a page to discuss my amazing invention.

**Hermes: **Hmm… This will come very useful indeed. Anyway, g2g now.

**Zeus: **What is it?

_(Jason Grace, Thalia Grace, Athena, and 1246 others dislike this)_

**Thalia Grace: **Seriously dad? You can't even work out what it is? HINT: _Olympian Facebook._

PS: YOU'RE EMBARRASSING ME!

_(Jason Grace likes this)_

**Zeus: **HOW DARE YOU, THALIA? Anyway, I have worked out that it is a book of god and demigod faces, am I not correct?

**Hades: **Come on brother! Even _I_ know that it's basically Facebook, except that it's designed for gods and demigods, not foolish mortals.

_(Zeus and Rachel Elizabeth Dare dislike this)_

**Rachel Elizabeth Dare: **HEY! I'm a mortal, ya know!

**Hephaestus: **Yes, I know. This is why I prevented any mortal but you (seeing as you are after all an important oracle) and several others.

_(Rachel Elizabeth Dare likes this)_

* * *

**Hephaestus: **ANYWAY, I haven't finished my announcement yet! Plus, Hades is right, Olympian Facebook is Facebook designed just for gods and demigods, and very few mortals (ie, Sally Jackson or Rachel Elizabeth Dare). Satisfied, Zeus?

Leo Valdez, my son, is now the deputy site administrator. I mean, who else can I trust?

_(Sally Jackson and Leo Valdez like this)_

_(The whole of Camp Half-Blood dislikes this)_

**Leo Valdez: **AWESOME, DAD! YOU ROCK!

**Hephaestus: **ikr :)

**Mr. D: **Now, to celebrate this occasion, Liam, would you like a glass of wine?

**Leo Valdez: **IT'S LEO! AND WINE SUCKS!

**Mr. D:** EXCUSE ME?

**Leo Valdez: **o_o. Sorry! I swear that I meant that WINE ROCKS!

**Percy Jackson: **You do realize that Mr. D won't fall for it, right? *big, long, heavy sigh*.

_(Leo Valdez is too occupied to dislike this)_

* * *

**Leo Valdez's Status: **'sup guys! I'm currently being chased by an angry Dionysus. :(

* * *

**Hephaestus: **DIONYSUS! STOP THAT NOW! BEFORE I TURN YOU INTO A LUMP OF WORTHLESS METAL!

_(Dionysus dislikes this)_

_(98 campers, and 72 gods who want Dionysus to get lost like this)_

* * *

**Leo Valdez has an announcement to make:**

TO ALL YOU GODS AND DEMIGODS, I NOW PRESENT TO YOU

* * *

**Mobile Olympian Facebook**

* * *

So basically, you can use your mobile phones to access Olympian Facebook.

**Jake Mason: **Cool! ;) Although it's not as cool as the Argo II...

**Hephaestus: ***face colour drains* Uh, Leo?

**Leo Valdez: **Yeah, dad?

**Hephaestus: **Did you add a special protection force to prevent it attracting monsters?

**Leo Valdez: **Oops. I guess I forgot about that bit *sheepish grin*. So... now what do we do?

_(Clarisse La Rue, Piper McLean, and 173 others dislike this)_

**Chiron: **CAMP! ASSEMBLE TO YOUR BATTLE POSITIONS, AND KILL ALL THE MONSTERS THAT PASS!

**Clarisse la Rue: **YOU IDIOT, VALDEZ! I SWEAR I'LL KILL YOU!

**Ares: **That's my daughter :).

**Hephaestus has now locked this page to prevent more damage.**

* * *

AFTER ONE LONG BATTLE

* * *

**Annabeth Chase: **Whew. *wipes sweat off face* At least we got out of there alive!

_(52 members of Camp Half–Blood who nearly died like this)_

**Thalia Grace: **That's only because The Hunters of Artemis helped you ;).

_(Artemis and The Hunters like this) _

**Artemis: **Correct. We were feeling _very _nice.

**Percy Jackson: **Yeah, right. Nice enough to aim an arrow at me!

_(Artemis and The Hunters (who are laughing) like this)_

**Camp Jupiter **has protested.

**Dakota: **Anyone want any Kool Aid?

_(Camp Jupiter and Camp Half-Blood dislike this)_

**Hazel Levesque: **Way to go off topic!

_(Camp Jupiter and Camp Half-Blood like this)_

**Reyna: **Camp! Do you have no politeness? We were just doing them a _favour. _We should just accept the fact that they didn't thank us.

**Octavian: **GAH! YOU'RE NOT A FIT PRAETOR!

_(Jason Grace, Reyna, Percy Jackson, and 38 others dislike this)_

**Frank Zhang: **Um, guys, why don't we just get along… ? :S

* * *

**A/N: I haven't got much to say...**

**Well, I hope you enjoyed this chapter.**

** Thanks to all those who are going to review/follow/favourite this story. Constructive Criticism will be greatly appreciated.  
**


	2. A Prank

******A/N: Thanks to EVERYONE who reviewed, favorited, followed, or even just read this fanfic.**

* * *

**Olympian Facebook**

* * *

**Reyna: **Members of Camp Half-Blood, we invite you to a 'party' at Camp Jupiter!

_(Percy Jackson, Jason Grace and 161 others like this)_

**Frank Zhang: **It would be AWESOME if you guys could come round again! :)

_(Hazel Levesque, Dakota, and several other members of Camp Jupiter like this)_

**Leo Valdez: **What's gonna be served there? ;) My stomach is rumbling!

**Reyna: **Um, actually, we were wondering if your camp could bring your own food. We're a bit short after YOU ate most of it.

_(Leo Valdez dislikes this)_

**Leo Valdez: **WHAT? No food=no Leo. :'( BTW, did I _really _eat _that _much.

**Piper McLean: **Seriously, Leo. Is that all you can think about? FOOD? And FYI, you did.

_(Jason Grace, Annabeth Chase and 39 others like this)_

**Chiron: **What is that you're short of? The camp could help :).

**Lupa: **He's quite right, you know.

**Reyna: **Cereal for the morning after –

**Katie Gardner: **The Demeter Cabin will take care of that, right sis?

_(The Demeter Cabin likes this)_

**Miranda Gardner: **Right :).

**Reyna: **Now as I was saying, we need –

**Jason Grace:** Just bring whatever you have, all right?

_(Reyna dislikes this)_

**Reyna: **AAARRRGHHHH! I was _just _trying to be serious and organizing an eventful day!

_(Octavian likes this)_

* * *

AT THE PARTY

* * *

**Leo Valdez:** Hey! Piper! You said there'd by chocolate chip muffins! :(

**Piper McLean:** There are *rolls eyes*. They're right in front of you *facepalm*.

**Leo Valdez:** Oh :/ *embarrassed* CHOCOLATE CHIP TIME! *munch, munch*.

**Percy Jackson:** Is it just me, or is it that Leo is obsessed with chocolate chip muffins, and is seriously ADHD?

_(Piper McLean, Annabeth Chase, Jason Grace and 47 others like this)_

**Annabeth Chase: ***sigh* Unfortunately, yes.

**Leo Valdez: **WHOOO! YEAH! I broke my old record!

**Piper McLean: **Old record of what?

**Leo Valdez: **Old record of eating 12 muffins in 2 minutes! I now just ate 15 muffins in 2 minutes! WHOO!

**Piper McLean: ***facepalm*

* * *

**Connor Stoll: **Hey, bro, why don't we pull a prank? It will be _soooooooooo _fun!

**Travis Stoll: **YEAH! Great idea! On who?

**Connor Stoll: **How 'bout that grumpy praetor! Romy, was it?

**Travis Stoll: **It's Reyna actually. But whatever. Who cares? C'mon, let's plan it! First, go and –

**Connor Stoll:** Er, we're on Facebook right now, so anyone could see our plan :/ Better discuss it face to face!

**Octavian: **Too right *evil laugh*!

**Travis Stoll:** BUSTED!

**Octavian:** As I'm very nice, I won't tell her. BUT… NOW, YOU OWE ME ONE!

**Connor: **Who knew that scrawny scarecrow dude could be so evil?

* * *

A WHILE LATER

* * *

**Reyna: **AAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHH! WHO DARED PLAY SUCH A TRICK ON ME? IT WAS ONE OF THOSE _GRAECI*_, WASN'T IT!

_(Octavian, Connor Stoll, and Travis Stoll are too afraid to like this)_

**Jason Grace: **Reyna, calm down!

**Annabeth Chase: **Hmmm… I think I know who… It was _probably _the Stolls.

_(Reyna likes this)_

**Reyna: **AND WHERE ARE THEY RIGHT NOW?

**Percy Jackson: **Umm… Er… Eh? What was the question again?

_(Reyna dislikes this)_

**Annabeth Chase: **JUST SPIT IT OUT ALREADY, SEAWEED BRAIN! Reyna's in (unfortunately) too bad of a mood!

**Percy Jackson: **Fine then, they're in _your_ praetor house with Octavian.

**Reyna: **WTF?

**Percy Jackson: **Told you so *sigh*

**Hazel Levesque: **First time I've heard Reyna swear. WOW, the Stoll's must have done something _really _bad. What did they do?

**Frank Zhang: **Haven't you heard? Well, if not, this is what they did…

* * *

**A/N: Sorry there's a cliffie. Don't kill me! As usual, hope you enjoy. Constructive Criticism is greatly appreciated.  
**

***I thank Rachel - Banner for informing me of my previous mistake of putting Graeceus instead of Graeci.**


	3. Disrespect

**A/N: Once again than thanks to everyone who reviewed/favourited/followed this story.**

* * *

**Olympian Facebook**

* * *

**Frank Zhang: **…Well, you know Argentum and Aurum, right?

**Percy Jackson: **Gold and Silver? The dogs?

**Annabeth Chase: **Actually, it's Silver and Gold. Duh, Seaweed Brain!

**Percy Jackson: **Whatever, Wise Girl. My Latin's not that great!

**Hazel Levesque: ***AHEM* *loud cough* May we please carry on?

**Pluto: **Why did you summon me, Hazel? I have no time to bother with unimportant things.

**Hazel Levesque: **Oops? That was a mistake. It was be-

**Frank Zhang **ANYWAY, the 2 pranksters from the Mercury Cabin –

_(Travis Stoll, Connor Stoll, Children of Hermes, and Hermes dislike this)_

**Travis Stoll: **HER-

**Connor Stoll: **MES!

**Frank Zhang: **Well, anyway, THEY switched them.

**Hazel Levesque: **Seriously? They switched them? NO ONE, I MEAN NO ONE, dares to mess with Reyna!

**Frank Zhang: **ikr. They must have had no common sense whatsoever. Besides, I haven't finished. So basically, they (the switched dogs) came out running halfway through a Camp Meeting with Reyna's… um…

**Reyna: **DON'T YOU DARE BREATH A WORD SAYING THAT THEY CAME RUNNING IN WITH MY UNDERWEAR! OR ELSE!

**Bobby: **Um... Praetor Reyna? Er… well… you kinda said that out loud :S

**Reyna: **Oh *face drops*. Oops. THAT'S IT! I'M GONNA KILL THEM!

**Frank Zhang: **Well, that was the first thing that happened. Oh, and BTW, the dogs ran round with Octavian's boxers too.

_(Reyna and Camp Jupiter like this)_

**Gwendolyn: **LOL! So funny! Leaves the stuffed-animal killer stuffed!

_(Octavian dislikes this)_

**Octavian: **Humph.. I'll be supporting Praetor Reyna, for once.

**Frank Zhang: **Oh, and you know the weapons from the armoury, right? Well, the Mer-, I mean Hermes, tricksters stole every single weapon we had... and they took Reyna's prized spear.

**Hylla: **I told you not to join this 'camp'! Is that all, Reyna? We Amazons have suffered worse fates. We're daughters of Bellona. We are strong and do NOT –

_(Bellona and the Amazons like this)_

**Reyna: ***AHEM*! ACTUALLY, they held a weapon throwing contest and see who could throw it the furthest (and ended up denting all our weapons). Thus, if invaders try to kill us, we will be weaponless!

**Hylla: **Instead of pointlessly getting annoyed, why don't you spend the time murdering the criminals?

**Reyna: **I don't know, to be fair. But I'll do that now!

* * *

**Connor Stoll: **OWWWWWWWWW! She.. She…. um… like.. well…. um.. uh..

**Travis Stoll: **HAHA! LOL! Look at your face!

_(Connor Stoll dislikes this)_

**Travis Stoll:** OUCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! She.. She…. er… like.. well…. um.. uh.. er..

_(Connor Stoll likes this)_

**Dakota: **I guess Reyna got her revenge!

* * *

**Reyna **is now planning to kill **Octavian **as well as the** Stoll brothers**

**Octavian: **HEY! What did_ I_ do?

**Reyna: **Oh, apart from killing stuffed animals, and being the annoying * !##! you are, YOU LET THEM INTO MY HOUSE! MY HOUSE, I TELL YOU! AND LET THEM PLAY ANOTHER JOKE ON ME! AND NOW MY TEETH ARE BLACK!

**Octavian: **At least I'm going to support you this time!

* * *

**Annabeth's Hat and Riptide are in a relationship**

* * *

**Percy Jackson: **WTF? Riptide? You're supposed to be in my pocket.

**Riptide: **I know, but sometimes I've gotta break the rules.

**Paul Blofis: **Now, now, Percy. We do not use inappropriate language on online socialising sites. That is just plain disrespectful.

**Percy Jackson: **Sorry, Paul. I'll try not to use anymore inappropriate language online.

**Paul Blofis: **That's OK, Percy, just don't do it again. Blimey! Look at the time! I'm going to be late work at this rate!

**Annabeth Chase: **OMG! Since when did a Yankees cap type? Oh and Percy, LOL! I love laughing at your misery!

_(Percy Jackson dislikes this with an absolute passion)_

**Percy Jackson: **Whatever. I'm wondering how a magically reappearing pen/sword can type? And how on earth does Paul know what WTF means? I mean, he's an English professor.

**Aphrodite: **OMG! EEK! *squeals* That is SO cute!

**Annabeth Chase: **I'm just gonna choose to ignore Aphrodite. As for Paul, I told him that, so that you could 'behave' *chuckle*. Anyway, where's my hat gone?

**Percy Jackson: **I dunno, but Riptide's got good taste ;), just like his owner. AND WHY DID YOU TELL PAUL?!

**Annabeth Chase: **AWWW. 3. That's so sweet! And why shouldn't I tell Paul?

**Leo Valdez: **Excuse me while I just puke into a bucket. *BLEEAARGH*.

_(Thalia Grace, Clarisse La Rue, Nico di Angelo and 248 other demigods like this)_

**Nico di Angelo: **Percy, I think you and Annabeth should, uh, talk about this somewhere else.

**Thalia Grace: **Death Boy over there is unfortunately correct.

* * *

**Paul Blofis has sent a message to Percy Jackson's inbox**

Percy, I'm very sorry to say this, but one of my brothers have just died. You will need to tell Chiron (I think) that due to a sad event, you will have to be excused out of camp. I sincerely hope you won't take the news too badly. LOL.

Paul

* * *

**Percy Jackson has replied to Paul Blofis**

Whoa! Way to be disrespectful Paul! How is _that _funny? I mean, I don't know my cousins that well, but still… Anyway, I'll tell Chiron.

Percy.

* * *

**Paul Blofis has replied to Percy Jackson **

It isn't funny. It is a most upsetting and tragic event. LOL.

Paul

* * *

**Percy Jackson replied to Paul Blofis**

Uh, Paul, you should know that LOL means laughing out loud.

Percy

* * *

**Paul Blofis replied to Percy Jackson **

Oh no! Darn it! I sent it to everyone who needed to attend the funeral! I thought it meant 'lots of love'! Thank you Percy, for informing me of this very unfortunate matter.

Paul

* * *

**Apollo wants Hephaestus to create a page for gods only**

* * *

**Hephaestus: **Sheesh! I can't do everything! But I can assure you it will be up soon.

* * *

**A/N: **

**Credits go to: **** America'sNextTopPresident for the prank, The Ellen Show for the LOL part (search 'Apparently Confused' on YouTube - it's really funny).**

******Not too great of a chapter, I know. Nevertheless, hope you enjoyed!**


	4. Apollo's Epic Haikus

**A/N: Hey guys, I'm back! Thanks again to everyone who reviewed/favourited/followed this story.**

* * *

**Apollo:** WOOT! THANKS! NOW I CAN PLAN WORLD DENOMINATION! MWAHAHAHA! What d'ya think of my brand new haiku, which took me like 2 seconds ;)

_I am the coolest god_

_I rule at everything_

_Everyone else sucks_

_(396 gods and goddesses dislike this)_

**Paul Blofis:** Does anyone know where my stepson Percy is?

**Sally Jackson:** We really need him for the funeral.

**Chiron:** Yes, he's on his way.

_(Paul Blofis and Sally Jackson like this)_

**Paul Blofis:** Thank you very much, good sir. And to the person who wrote that haiku, your first line has 6 syllables. You also put others down, therefore concluding that you are not a gentleman. _And_ your grammar is terrible. You tend to use very simple words. Why don't you try expanding your vocabulary?

**Apollo: **I'M A GOD! I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT!

**Athena: **LOL! APOLLO! YOU JUST GOT PWND BY A MORTAL! LOL! XD!

_(Apollo dislikes this)_

**Apollo: **HEPHAESTUS! WHERE THE !* !?*? HELL ARE YOU?

**Hephaestus: **Sigh. Language, language. I told you this was just a prototype. It'll take me a few more days to make it completely god-proof.

**Apollo: **Hmm… If I give you a million drachmas, will you have it ready by the end of today? *fingers crossed*. He he...

**Hephaestus: **Most definitely - as long as you give me those drachmas.

* * *

**Leo Valdez: **Uh… Dad? Could I have a bit of help? I kinda set the Argo II on fire… :S

**Apollo: **SHUT UP, YOU IMBECILE! YOUR FATHER HAS BETTER THINGS TO DO!

**Leo Valdez:** :'( *sob, sob*

* * *

**Annabeth Chase: **WTF MOM? YOU CAN ACTUALLY USE CHAT LANGUAGE?

_(Percy Jackson, Poseidon, and 1311 surprised others this)_

**Athena: **OF COURSE, HOW DARE YOU DOUBT ME!

* * *

**Apollo: **Thank you Hephaestus. Here's a haiku I've made in honour of you (I decided to ignore that foolish mortal):

_He is epicly cool_

_He is good at really hard stuff_

_You rule, Hephaestus!_

_(Hephaestus likes this)_

**Orpheus: **Dad, pardon me if I'm wrong, but your poem has 6 syllables on the first line, and 8 on the second. And is epicly even a word?

_(Apollo dislikes this)_

**Zeus: **Apollo, a word of advice; DON'T EVEN BOTHER TRYING!

**Hephaestus: **Hey, where's my drachmas? :S I'm not happy. :'(

**Apollo: **Can't you read, you old codger *evil smirk*? I did this: *fingers crossed*. B-D

**Hephaestus: **By Hades, he did! I'll kill you!

**Hades: **I would LOVE to kill him too, but unfortunately his immortality disagrees. :( AND CAN EVERYONE QUIT USING MY NAME FOR CURSING?

_(Aphrodite, Pluto, Leo Valdez and 487 others like this)_

* * *

**Apollo:** 'sup guys! What's hanging with the Gods today? Probably about how amazingly awesome I am *smirk*.

**Artemis: **Brother, you have far too big of an ego. Oh and remember this saying, 'All men are equal – equally useless'.

**Zeus: **EXCUSE ME? I AM YOUR FATHER! HOW DARE YOU!

**Artemis: **Er… Sorry father, no disrespect intended. What _I mean to say _was 'All men are equal – but sun gods aren't'.

**Zeus: **I'm satisfied.

* * *

**Blackjack **has decided he hates Percy Jackson.

* * *

**Frank Zhang: **Why? Percy's popular with horses.

**Blackjack: **C'mon, bro! I call him boss, _just once_, by the slip of the tongue, and you know what he does? HE PUNCHES ME ON THE NOSE!

**Annabeth's Hat: **I'm sure Annabeth will be disappointed with Percy, isn't that right, honey bun?

_(Riptide likes this)_

**Riptide:** Of course, my dear.

**Annabeth Chase: **WTF HAT? AND PERCY? I THOUGHT I TOLD YA TO CONTROL YOUR TEMPER! Sorry… I think I overdid it a bit.

**Percy Jackson: **Fair enough. I'll try. Just for you. And Riptide, how did you make a OFB account?

**Aphrodite: ***coos and squeals* AW… THAT'S SO CUTE!

**Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase agree that:**

**Gods/Goddesses, objects, and parents are as embarrassing as hell.**

_(Thalia Grace, Leo Valdez, Jason Grace and 4213 others like this)_

* * *

**The Gods and Goddesses of Olympus: ***AHEM* We gods/goddesses all demand that all the foolish demigods who clicked the 'like' button on Perseus Jackson and Annabeth Chase's comment MUST undo it, unless they wish to tell us personally that we suck and want to get grounded in their cabin for the rest of the year.

**Thalia Grace: **Jason, it's time to go soppy. You know the drill. PLEASE DADDY, DON'T *bawls eyes out*!

**Jason Grace: **Y-y-yes daddy! I'm scared *shivers and shakes*.

**Zeus: **Very well then, I believe that punishment is too harsh. Everyone else in favour? OR do you want to rot in the pits of Tartarus?

_(All gods/goddesses are too afraid of the pits of Tartarus to dislike this)_

* * *

**Thalia Grace sent a private message to Jason Grace**

* * *

OMG, little bro! I can't believe dad actually fell for it. Cruel, right?

Thalia.

* * *

**A/N: ... That last bit might be OOC, I don't know. Constructive Criticism is greatly appreciated. Hope you enjoyed!**


	5. An Angry Mob of Angry Blondes

**A/N: No, guys, I haven't died or fallen into a hole or got taken into Camp Half-Blood (I wish). I apologize for taking so long to update. I can't be bothered to make a list of excuses, so...**

* * *

**Jason Grace replied to Thalia Grace**

* * *

Dear Thalia Grace,

I hope that this message gets to you in good time.

Yeah, ikr? But little bro? I'm sixteen and you're fifteen!

_Jason Grace_

_Official Praetor of the Twelfth Legion_

* * *

**Thalia Grace replied to Jason Grace**

* * *

But I'm _immortal _:P And seriously, what's up with the Praetor signing off thingy and the dear introduction thingy? Oh well. Two can play at this game. ;) AND DON'T CALL ME GRACE!

_Thalia_

_Official Lieutenant of Artemis' Hunters_

* * *

**Jason Grace replied to Thalia Grace**

* * *

Humph. I suppose. But still... And the 'thingys' was because Reyna forced me to. :/ She threatened me! WITH A KNIFE!

Jason

PS: Sorry about the 'Grace' business.

* * *

**Thalia Grace replied to Jason Grace**

* * *

How the hell did Reyna even see you writing your message to me? BTW, you're a wimp.

Thalia

* * *

**Jason Grace replied to Thalia Grace**

* * *

FYI, she DIDN'T see me write you a message. Some Vulcan kid added a thingamajig which would automatically add that

_Dear _,_

_I hope this message gets to you in good time, _blah blah blah.

Jason

PS: There was this time when she... uh... nevermind.

* * *

**Thalia Grace replied to Jason Grace**

* * *

Okayyy...

Thalia

PS: Spill. Now.

* * *

**Thalia Grace **has a _extremely _important announcement to make: **Jason Grace **is –

**Jason Grace: **OH NO, YOU'RE NOT! YOU ARE _NOT _GOING TO BETRAY MY SECRET!

**Thalia Grace: **Am too :P

_(Percy Jackson, Piper McLean and 325 curious others like this)_

**Jason Grace: **LEO! BLOCK THALIA _GRACE _FROM POSTING ANYTHING! NOW!

**Thalia Grace: **HOW DARE YOU USE MY SURNAME? YOU WILL REGRET THIS!

**Leo Valdez: **Nah, this is fun watching you get humiliated! :P

_(Jason Grace dislikes this)_

**Jason Grace: **YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS, MAN!

**Reyna: **Jason, there's a praetor meeting in 10 minutes. Be there or else!

**Thalia Grace: **Right, **Jason Grace **... has gotten babysat by **Reyna.**

**Reyna: **JASON...

**Jason Grace:** Reyna: Why are you mad at me? I mean _she's _the one who's posting it, for the world to see. AND SHE THREATENED ME! WITH AN ELECTRIC SPEAR!

**Reyna: **But, _you're _the one who told her about it in the first place. AND she's a girl! And for the last thing you said, it is your own fault as you are a pathetic wimp. Remember that.

_(Thalia Grace and 264 other 'girls' like this) _

**Thalia Grace: **Nah nah ne nah nah :P

**Jason Grace **is now currently unavailable.

_(Thalia Grace likes this)_

**Thalia Grace **is now currently unavailable.

**Piper McLean: **Um, guys? Where have you gone?

**Hazel Levesque: **I'm here! :)

**Piper McLean:** But where's everyone else...? They've all run away... because of me? :'(

* * *

**Reyna **is looking for someone to have an intellectual conversation (as **Thalia Grace **has disappeared) with.

**Percy Jackson: **What does interlektal mean?

_(Athena and Annabeth Chase dislike this)_

**Athena: ***facepalm* Sometimes, I really lose hope for our future generation.

**Malcolm: **I'm sure Annabeth's up for it!

**Annabeth Chase **and **Reyna **are now having a _intellectual _private conversation.

**Leo Valdez: **But there's tons of dumb blonde jokes! Like this one:

**Q: Why is a blonde's brain the size of a pea in the morning?**

A: Because it swells up at night!

In other words, how can a blonde have an _intellectual _conversation?

_(392412 rightly offended blondes dislike this)_

**Piper McLean: **Leo, you have the ability annoy everyone to the point where they want you to be murdered. I mean, no one can be _that _annoying.

_(392412 blondes like this)_

**Jason Grace: **Man, I think you forgot _one _thing.

**Leo Valdez: **What?

**Jason Grace: **I'M BLONDE! And remember what you did _earlier? _

**Leo Valdez: **Oh, **** **** ******* ******** *******

**Hephaestus: **FYI, Leo's *ahem* unmentionable words have been starred out for your safety. Son, I'm ashamed of you!

**Jake Mason: **Leo, you seriously _need _to hide right now. A mob of angry blondes, led by Annabeth, have almost broken our cabin door!

* * *

**Annabeth Chase **has created the group **'Valdez to the Underworld'.**

* * *

_(Jason Grace, Annabeth Chase and 625 others have joined the group)_

* * *

**Rachel Elizabeth Dare: **Hey, I know he's been pretty stupid, but isn't that a bit too far? I mean, Charon owes you a favour, and if he sees this he might actually send him there... :/

**Jason Grace: **Nope, not at all!

**Rachel Elizabeth Dare: **Prophecy time! (Note: It's really suckish...). But hey, who's to judge? I was bored.

_One made a mistake,_

_Go to the Underworld he shall,_

_But fate's swift hand decides his pain,_

_Not the Underworld he shall face,_

_But instead an angry mob._

**Annabeth Chase: **Yup, now _that _is true.

**Hades: **As annoying as that boy is, I will not send him to the Underworld for no good reason. And Nico, Demeter is about to give a 'Cereal-is-extremely-important-EAT-IT-OR-ELSE' lecture. You better be with me!

**Nico di Angelo: **Yes, dad... :( DEMETER'S LECTURES FTL! THEY SUCK!

_(Katie Gardner, Miranda Gardner and 472 others like this)_

**Percy Jackson: **What does FTL stand for?

_(Everyone likes Percy's idiocity)_

**Hermes: **Something that kiddo made up. Probably based on my awesome FTW! (that's For The Win, BTW)

**Nico di Angelo:** Hey! :( I'm not a kid! And FTL = For the Lose!

**Demeter: ***logs on* :'( *sob, sob*. My lectures suck :( ...

**Katie Gardner: **M-OM! Will you please act more – grown up?

**Demeter:** *sniffs disdainfully* Fine then! YOU DARE, YOU FOOLISH BOY! I WILL SEND YOU TO THE THE PITS OF TARTARUS IMMEDIATELY!

**Katie Gardner: **Uh, mom. Not _that _aggressive.

**Connor Stoll: **Hmmm... Prank?...

**Travis Stoll: **Not now bro, not now. Leo's _just_ got away with it... Imagine if _we _didn't...

* * *

**Travis Stoll **and **Connor Stoll **would like to say: **May the 4****th**** be with you!**

* * *

**Clarisse La Rue: **C'mon guys! That joke is so old! And it's not even May!

**Percy Jackson: **Why do we celebrate it anyway?

**Chris Rodriguez: **NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... Annabeth's gonna start a long (boring) lecture now! :(

**Annabeth Chase: ***facepalm* *sigh* OK, basically on July the 4th, 1776, America gained its independence from Great Britain... ↓ Show more...

**Hephaestus: **I'm sorry, but her rant was way too long :/ so... yeah.

**Athena: **These people don't have respect for intelligence, Annabeth.

* * *

**Aphrodite posted on Hephaestus' wall: **Take me out for dinner tonight? ^_^

* * *

**Hephaestus: **Um, sure...?

**Aphrodite: **YAY! :)

_(Silena Beauregard, Piper McLean, and 32 other children of Aphrodite like this)_

**Clarisse La Rue: **Silena? YOU'RE ALIVE!

**Charles Beckendorf: **So am I ;) Although I hate my user name dad gave me :/

**Annabeth Chase: **Wait a minute! If you guys can type from the Underworld... OMG! YOU GUYS ARE ALIVE!

**Silena Beauregard: **OMG! ANNABETH SAID OMG!

**Dionysus: **Perfect! An occasion that _needs _wine.

**Percy Jackson: **Lol. It's funny how none of this is to do with Aphrodite's date...

* * *

**Annabeth Chase: **Don't you find that it's funny how Zeus is _technically _the youngest god, but yet he's the head god?

* * *

**A/N: First, I live in Great Britain. So here right now it's July the 4th, although it may be the 3rd or 5th in America, so sorry if I made a mistake. Anyway, I _had _to put that in because I saw that 3/4 of my hits came from America. **

**And Annabeth's question will be debated soon. Plus, Aphrodite's date will be explained in more detail soon. Soon= 1, 2, 3 or more chapters later.**

**Constructive Criticism is always appreciated.**


	6. An Oxymoron

**A/N: Whoa! It's been, what? 2 months since I updated? I'm really sorry. **

**Sadly, my Grandad died a few days ago. R.I.P Grandad.**

** As you can see, there's a new format. I HAD to change it because some new FF rules state that a 'chat' format is no longer allowed. These rules did NOT exist when I uploaded the first chapter. Thanks again to everyone who reviewed/favourited/followed this story.**

* * *

**IN HER ROOM, furiously typing away in her gifted laptop was Annabeth. **

Annabeth was thinking about the various aspects of Zeus. _He isn't exactly a great ruler, _she thought, _but then again nobody's perfect. _Thunder rumbled in the distance. "Sorry, Zeus!" she called out, though she wasn't really sorry. Hmm... Aha! She found thought of another 'against' point: _The God of Skies has a terrible wife_. She had been at this for 5 hours. However, she still needed to decide whether Zeus was a good ruler, or not. Frustrated, Annabeth banged her head against her laptop.

* * *

In the end, she thought of something. She went on to Facebook and typed.

'**Don't you guys find it weird that Zeus is the youngest god, yet he's the king of gods?'**

Now, she just hoped a few people were online to answer her 'oh-so-important' question.

**Well, I saved their miserable lives, so they should thank me! **– Zeus' comment popped up.

Turns out, pretty much everyone disliked this.

Next, she saw her own mother's reasoning –

**However, the older you are, the more wisdom you acquire. Thus, the youngest is most likely to be the most foolish and ignorant. The wiser you are, the better.**

Annabeth chuckled as she read that. Smiling to herself, she pressed the 'Like' button. Almost immediately, 245 people liked that comment.

Not surprisingly, a minute later, Zeus replied.

**HOW DARE YOU? HOW DARE YOU, ATHENA? WITHOUT ME, YOU WOULDN'T HAVE EXISTED! Humph. Foolish children. **

Demeter then made a long, boring post.

**Zeus, I'm your sister. I **_**could **_**have been the ruler of gods. *sob, sniff*. And we had Persephone together! Who unfortunately got stolen by that evil kidnapper, Hades! *sniff, sob* Brother dear, would you **_**just **_**inform everyone that cereal should be eaten – every single hour! **

Annabeth was thinking, _Typical Demeter. _Why did she have to be so dramatic, especially on cereal?

As if someone was reading her mind, a comment said –

**That's just typical of her, isn't it? And since when was Demeter Zeus' sister?**

She mentally facepalmed herself. _Typical Seaweed Brain. _Annabeth decided to join the conversation. However, just as she was about to type something, a million comments popped up.

* * *

**Not enough violence! **– Ares, of course.

**Too stupid! – **Now, Annabeth knows her mum wasn't one to insult people, but this case was an exception.

**Asks 2 mch frm me! I mean, hw cn I dlvr evry1's mail in 2 hrs?! **Annabeth's brain screamed with pain at this person's terrible grammar. Eventually she managed to translate it:

**Asks too much from me! I mean, how can I deliver everyone's mail in 2 hours?!**

Ah... Clearly, that was Hermes.

**Cheats too much!** screamed Hera. _True,_ Annabeth thought, _but who cares about Hera?_ Here grudge was still as strong as ever. Thunder rumbled, and Annabeth rolled her eyes.

**He has a terrible wife! **Ah, at least Hephaestus agreed with her.*****

**Doesn't eat enough cereal! **– Demeter. Again. She really needs to lay off about cereal. On and it went, with the gods eventually screaming insults at one another. Annabeth thought it was time to put a stop to it. She knew her schedule for tomorrow, and found the perfect solution.

* * *

She posted:

**EVERYONE! Right, we're going to hold a debate tomorrow afternoon, at 13:00PM. Everyone agree? We shall rendezvous at my wall.**

* * *

**All in favour of my daughter? **– Athena asked. Almost all the gods agreed, apart from Ares and Zeus. Annabeth felt very proud of herself and pressed the 'Like' button.

**Ares, you're outnumbered. You're in. Zeus, you can judge. **– Athena wrote. Zeus seemed satisfied, and Ares couldn't really do much about it. An excellent solution, Annabeth believed. Unless, of course, Ares decides to start World War III...

* * *

**THALIA WAS bored. **_Very, very, _bored. She started zapping at random objects. Unfortunately, one of them turned out to be Phoebe.

"OW! THALIA!"

"Sorry, Phoebe!" Thalia called out, though she wasn't really sorry at all.

Power. That was her fatal flaw. Ah, who cares?

She then logged on to Facebook and decide to go on Jason's Wall.

* * *

**Name: **Jason Grace

**Age: **16

**Home: **Camp Jupiter or Camp Half-Blood

**Current Location: **At a praetor meeting. I'm supposed to be taking notes, but...

**Interested in: **Skipping praetor meetings, making plans which lead to killing Octavian, NOT fighting giants and hating Gaea. Oh, and not annoying my sister. Last time, well, I vanished into thin air. Well, no, I didn't but...

... she kinda threatened me...

* * *

Thalia grinned manically while reading the last few sentences.

**HA! Take that! **

Then, the oh-so-annoying Leo Valdez decided to join in.

**Wassup, Sparky? What did she do to ya?**

Of course her brother would give a lame response.

**Uh... nothing?**

2 seconds later, Piper went on and joined the conversation.

**Yeah, sure Jason...**

Her comment immediately received 158 likes. That was quick...

Next, Hazel went on.

**Sure, Jason...**

Percy came on.

**Sure, Jason...**

Annabeth came on and joined her boyfriend.

**Sure, Jason...**

Eventually, everyone from the two camps was saying, **Sure, Jason...**

Jason gave weak protests such as:

**No, she didn't do anything! :'D**

**Seriously, she did nothing!**

**Uh, my account malfunctioned!**

He kept doing this until _Lupa, _Lupa, of all people came on.

**Sure, Jason...**

* * *

Eventually, Piper decided that Jason had been mocked enough.

**Does this have anything to do with your disappearance online? ;)**

Or maybe not...

* * *

**Piper McLean **has been blocked from posting on **Jason Grace's Wall.**

Thalia snorted. Really, Jason? That big of a wimp? Yeah, she enjoyed her reunion with Jason, but sooner or later, younger brothers turn annoying.

* * *

**Piper McLean **has been unblocked from posting on **Jason Grace's Wall.**

Can Jason make up his mind?

* * *

Her younger brother then protested.

**Wha – what?! How did **_**that **_**happen?**

**LOL, son of Hephaestus extras. Plus, Beauty Queen here is an excellent tool to annoy you.**

Ah... maybe that Valdez _did _have his uses.

**Don't call me Beauty Queen, Repair Boy!**

Thalia laughed. Repair Boy?

**Shut up! I'm the Supreme Commander of the Argo II! TAKE THAT!**

Thalia facepalmed. Even more comments started popping up. Thalia ignored most of them. Wait – what was this?

* * *

**Now, killing Octavian is a different story. However, you are receiving a punishment for skipping praetor meetings! And another one for procrastinating! Being a praetor is a HUGE responsibility! You act as a peer model for the rest of the group. Take them more seriously!**

Thalia snickered. Man, Jason was in _big _trouble –  
**Yeah, Jason!**

Reyna liked it, thus making Thalia grin manically.

The victim then gave his dying words (note the sarcasm) –

**Hey! You're not taking notes either.**

**Whatever. **– came Reyna's response. Everyone 'Liked' this. _What the? _Thalia thought. The most serious person on the universe says 'Whatever.' What was the world turning into?

**Uh, what just happened? **– Hazel asked.

**NOOOO! The world is coming to an end¬ Oh and Thalia, how about a date tonight? ;) If the world's gonna end, I might as well have a date to end it with. **– The Valdez boy asked. Thalia fumed.

Furiously, she typed in her response:

**I. Am. A. Freakin'. Hunter. I WILL NOT DATE YOU! **

Artemis happened to be online and saved her:

**No boy will be allowed to date **_**any**_** hunters.**

Apollo your Sunshine – wait, what? said –

**How about gods? I'm always free, Thalia ;)**

"AAAARRRGHH!" Thalia screamed with annoyance. Why does everyone have to keep hitting on her?

**Lay one finger, and you're dead, brother. What the moon is up with 'your Sunshine'?**

Ah, thanks Artemis.

Apollo your Sunshine (what a stupid name) replied –

**Ah, I'm just so amazingly handsome! I am every girl's sun! Of course, you wouldn't understand 'cos you're younger than me.**

Thalia facepalmed herself. Was he trying to get himself killed?

**You. Will. Die.**

Then, Artemis logged off. Thankfully, Apollo your Sunshine did too.

* * *

Reyna then carried on. Finally, a change of subject!

**Your punishment is to kill Octavian – **

Jason then cut her off –

**You call that a punishment?**

**Actually, I was about to say **_**kill Octavian's teddy bears**_**.**

**NOOOOOOO! ANYTHING, BUT THAT! **– Hah, Jason!

**Don't worry, no one will be there. Apart from Octavian **said Reyna.

Tough luck, Jason.

* * *

She was about to exit when a notification popped out: _You have been tagged in a photograph with Jason Grace, Annabeth Chase, Piper McLean, Leo Valdez and 5 others._ Huh? She didn't remember that. Better check that suspicious photograph!

The Stolls. Well, she should've guessed. The photograph was one of those ones with personalities such as 'the happy one' or 'the sad one' with matching faces.

**Jason** was tagged as 'the confused one'.

**Annabeth **was tagged as 'the Geek'.

**Piper** was tagged as 'the beautiful one'.

**Leo** was tagged as 'the annoying one'. Well, they got that right. Thalia wished the Valdez boy would stop hitting on her.

**Percy **was tagged as 'the stupid one'

**Reyna** was tagged as 'the grumpy one'

**Gwen** was tagged as 'the happy one'.

**Octavian** was tagged as 'the sad one'.

And **Dionysus** was tagged as 'the drunk one'. Huh. Figures.

But **Thalia** herself was crowned 'the dangerous one'.

She scrolled through the comments.

**Hey! I'm not stupid!**

**Yes you are, Kelp Face. And Woo Hoo! No one should mess with me! **– Thalia replied.

**I'M NOT GRUMPY! **protested Reyna.

**YES! I GOT THE ANNOYING ONE!**

**I'M NOT SAD! I merely like killing teddy bears. **Well, that _is _sad.

**^_^ Stay cheerful, everybody!**

**It's not my fault I lost my memories!**

**Geek? GEEK?! THAT IS AN INSULT TO INTELLIGENCE AND ALL CHILDREN OF ATHENA!**

**I can't even drink a drop of wine, you brats! Humph.**

* * *

Yeah, boring comments. Wait...

**Punch yourself, slice onions, and cry. Oh, and take a video of it! Make sure you post it. **– Piper charmspoke.

Thalia punched herself. Fortunately the Hunters asked what on earth was she doing. She soon came to her senses and stopped punching herself.

Then, she laughed.

* * *

**10 MINUTES LATER...**

* * *

**The Stolls have posted a video.**

Thalia clicked the 'PLAY' button. The sight that beheld her was music to her ears. Or rather, to her eyes.

Both Connor and Travis were punching themselves. It was hilarious! And they were mumbling 'Why are we doing this again?' to themselves.

_Ouch!_

Travis is going to get one black eye. Then they ran to their cabin, where some onions were ready. They started slicing them.

_Ow! _

That has to hurt for Connor. Suddenly, they started bawling their lungs out. The tearful Stolls. What an oxymoron.

Then the Travis and Connor started commenting.

* * *

**WHY PIPER, WHY? **Travis asked.

'**Cause it would be funny. And I needed some entertainment. Plus, don't call me beautiful! Unless you want a black eye? **Piper had responded.

**IT HURTS! IT HURTS! **Connor announced.

**Well, duh! **Piper wrote.

**Anyway, you guys have to admit, the video was **_**pretty **_**entertaining.** Percy had written. Wait, Percy? Ah, he said something intelligent for once. Annabeth agreed.

**Percy, are you sure you're feeling alright?**

**Yeah, why? **he asked.

**You actually said something intelligent and not stupid today. **Annabeth answered.

**Gee, thanks. Nice to know my girlfriend thinks really highly of me.**

* * *

Thalia quickly logged off. She knew this would soon turn sappy and lovey-dovey.

She went with the other hunters and practiced their archery skills. A new hunter almost hit Thalia with an arrow. Fortunately Thalia was used to this.

"Aegis!" she cried.

Then, Aegis sprang to life and defended her. She sighed. This was becoming a daily routine.

She exited the practice area and looked for Artemis. She couldn't find her. Odd. Where was she?

* * *

Then, she decided to take a quick walk. Then, her question was solved.

* * *

"THALIA!" a familiar voice 'greeted'. Quickly, she turned around, brandishing her spear and Aegis.

Relieved, she saw Annabeth's face. She had just been IMed. They chattered about camp, monsters, and Hunters.

"So, it was nice talking to you and all, but what do you want?" Thalia asked.

"Oh, right. Basically, Chiron invited you guysover."

"Wait, what?"

"Odd, I know, but apparently Percy said something that annoyed Artemis, which means the moon won't come up."

"Like how Apollo was saying 'Apollo your Sunshine'?"

"Pretty much."

"Okay, but how is this supposed to help?" Thalia impatiently demanded.

"We play Capture the Flag. You win. Artemis is happy."

"Oh, okay, I'll tell them we need to go soon. And, by the way, how come I didn't know this?"

"Oh, _that. _Artemis was seething for ages. She probably forgot through her 'anger'."

"Ah..." Thalia responded, thinking that Artemis must be _very _mad for this to happen.

"Thanks, see you in an hour." Annabeth then slashed through the image and cut the connection off.

* * *

**A/N: That was the longest chapter so far... **

**Once again, sorry for not updating in a long time. What do you think of the new format? My plan is to rewrite Chapters 1 - 5 so that the format would be suitable and wouldn't break the rules. Afterwards, it'll be continued from Chapter 6. So a Chapter 7 will NOT pop up until a long time. Or in other words, until I finish rewriting Chapters 1 - 5. Oh, and, hope you enjoyed.**

**Constructive Criticism is greatly appreciated.**


End file.
